Guilt. With chloeas.

[olliequeen]

She'd saved his life.

And he'd treated her like crap.

That was all he could think as he walked the darkened streets of Metropolis alone--for once not as the Green Arrow, but as Oliver Queen, sorry ass billionaire. Rubbing his face with one hand, he stopped in a small, all night diner and bought a cup of coffee. It wasn't Starbucks, but it was too late to get Starbucks. By the time he'd get there, it would already be closed. Apparently most places like that closed before Midnight.

By the time he made it back to the clock tower, it was nearly 12:30, and he'd been gone for hours, and he still didn't feel any better about the whole situation than he had when he'd turned tail and run from her.

Comments

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

She hadn't done much better either, even after doing her best to distract herself with a long shower, work, packing, some more work and now, back to packing, she just kept waiting for him to get back, but when she finally heard the elevator, she didn't feel in the least ready to face him, so she stayed in her room, sitting on the floor, suitcase in front of her and all the presents she had to fit into it on a pile by her side, she was sitting in the direction of the door, so she could see him when he walked down the hall and towards his own room.

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

The fact that she wasn't in the living room didn't surprise him, as much as it made him feel even guiltier. Forcing himself to take a deep breath, he slowly headed down the hallway. "I brought coffee," he said softly, pausing outside her door but not daring to step inside the room.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

Chloe looked up, surprised that he actually had come to talk to her, she got up and took a couple of steps towards him, "you didn't have to, thank you."

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

He avoided her eyes, hesitantly holding the cup out to her. "Sure," he murmured.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

After taking it from him, she moved to sit down on the edge of her bed, sipping on the coffee quietly before looking at him again, "I don't like this."

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

"Did I get the wrong kind?" he asked uncertainly, frowning.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

The tiniest hint of a smile appeared on her lips at his question and she shook her head, "I wasn't talking about the coffee."

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

"Oh," he murmured, leaning heavily against her doorframe and staring down at the floor.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

With a soft sigh, she looked down at her coffee, she didn't want to talk about it, but she knew she had to sooner or later and if Oliver was coming to Smallville with her, she wanted him to have a good Christmas, possibly the first good Christmas he'd have since his parents died. She couldn't take that away from him.

"What made you think I didn't care?"

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

If anything, Oliver wanted to talk about it even less than she did at that point. But he owed her an explanation now, all things considered. He drew in a breath and let it out slowly, shaking his head.

"I know you care, Chloe. I just..." He looked away for a moment, then shut his eyes. "You were right."

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

She glanced at him and shook her head slightly, "I don't wanna be right about anything, Oliver, I just wanna know what made you feel that way. You're one of my best friends and," she paused with a soft shrug, "I don't want you to feel like you don't matter."

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

He was quiet for a long moment. "Am I?" he asked softly, opening his eyes to look at her. "We don't really talk, we just..." He gestured between them and looked away once more. "I don't know. I know I'm not that guy. I don't know how to be."

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

That made her stop, and with a soft frown, she turned to look at him, "I don't expect you to be one way or another and I don't expect you to be Clark," she kept her voice as soft as she could, "if you want to talk, we can talk, but we do have conversations, Oliver, I will listen to anything you have to say."

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

He drew in a breath and let it out slowly, lifting his gaze to meet hers once more. "I'd listen, too," he said quietly.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

Cocking her head, she nodded, holding his gaze, "I know you would. Otherwise I wouldn't call you a friend."

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

He nodded slightly, looking away. She knew he'd listen, but that didn't mean she was going to talk. "All right," he murmured.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

"What is it, Oliver?" She asked as she watched him, she didn't know what he wanted and if he didn't tell her, she couldn't figure it out.

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

He drew in a breath and glanced at her again, hesitantly taking a step into the room and pausing. "Can I..." He nodded slightly toward her arm.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

Cocking her head, she nodded, shifting to one side of the bed to make room for him, not realizing until then that he hadn't stepped into her room.

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

Swallowing hard, he slowly moved to her side and gently took her arm in his hands, eyes perusing her pale skin. Relief washed over him when he saw no sign of red marks or bruises. Without thinking about it, he kissed her skin there, tender and soft, exhaling slowly.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

She sighed softly and shook her head, watching him but not moving away, "I told you you didn't hurt me."

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

He didn't look up at her, couldn't look up at her. "Needed to make sure."

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

"Stop kicking yourself for it, you've done enough of it as is, I'm sure." She said quietly, watching him.

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

He drew in a breath and looked up at her. "I never wanted to scare you. Or hurt you."

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

Looking up at him, she shook her head again, holding his gaze, "you didn't." And he hadn't, she just didn't want him to have control over her like that when they were arguing.

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

"All right," he said quietly, meeting her gaze for a moment, then letting go of her arm and rising to his feet.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

"That's it?" She asked, frowning in confusion as she watched him get up.

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

His back was to her as he faced the door. "Unless there was something else you wanted to say," he said quietly.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

"You looked like you did," she said quietly, watching him.

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

"I think I said more than enough for one night." His voice was soft.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

Chloe hesitated for a second then took a deep breath, getting up and touching his arm, waiting for him to turn to face her again, she didn't want to leave things that way they were. And she didn't want him thinking she was mad at him.

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

Oliver shut his eyes for a moment, then opened them once more and slowly turned to face her, falling silent as their eyes met.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

Silently, she stepped closer and wrapped her arms tightly around him, closing her eyes as she did, she didn't want him to think she didn't care, and no matter what they said earlier, she just wanted to help him not be miserable around Christmas for once and she had made it much worse instead, so now she had to fix it.

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

He was nearly caught off guard by her actions and for a moment, he was frozen. Then he shut his eyes again, sliding his arms around her, as well, holding onto her tightly. One of his hands buried itself in her blonde hair.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

She sighed, relieved when her hugged her back, tightening her arms around him a little more and relaxing a little.

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

He felt her relax in his arms and he rested his head against hers for a moment, letting himself relax, too.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

After a long moment, she pulled her head back slightly and turned it towards him, pursing her lips together and shrugging, "I didn't mean to upset you, I just wanted you to come with me."

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

"I know," he said quietly, meeting her gaze for a moment, then slowly pulling back and away from her. "You should get some sleep. It's late."

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

She sighed softly and nodded, letting her arms drop to her sides, "yeah, you too."

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

"Goodnight, Chloe," Oliver said softly, turning and heading toward the door.

[chloeas.livejournal.com]

"Night, Oliver," she said quietly then turned back to her suitcase that was on the floor, still feeling like nothing was solved, even if it was better than it was a couple of hours ago.

This was going to be the first time they would sleep in separate beds when he was in town since they started doing... whatever it was that they were doing and it was weird, but they both needed some space, besides, there was definitely no mood for sex so there wasn't a reason for them to sleep together.

[dl-greenarrow.livejournal.com]

Oliver stepped into his bedroom and stared at the large bed for a long moment, then raked a hand through his hair. He was exhausted. Drained, confused, guilty, disappointed, hurt and as much as he didn't want to admit it--even to himself--defeated.

He shouldn't have come to Metropolis to give Chloe the gifts. He should have had Bart deliver them instead. Or even paid someone to deliver them.

He should have either stayed in Star City, or flown halfway around the world to lay low until the holidays were over. Instead, he'd chosen to follow his heart--the one thing that seemed to keep getting him into trouble over and over. It couldn't happen again.

It wouldn't happen again, he vowed.

Not now.

Not ever.